Title: What Goes Unsaid
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~9000
Warnings D/s exploration and play, spanking, rimming, slut shaming dirty talk in a loving context, and lots of sex
Spoilers: Season 3 I guess.
Beta: alianne
AN: Written for this prompt on the kink meme: after Kurt and Blaine have been in a sexual relationship for a little while, Kurt starts to suspect that what Blaine really wants is to be dominated. Blaine's embarrassed by these urges and won't talk about it, though, so one night when Blaine's parents aren't home, Kurt basically just turns up at Blaine's house and starts ordering him around (bonus points if he orders Blaine onto his knees) and they have really intensely good sex in which Kurt makes Blaine beg for it and Blaine pretty much takes to subbing for Kurt like he was born to do it. When they talk about it after, Blaine admits that it's something he's always wanted, and Kurt tells Blaine how much he loved being in control, and they agree to explore the whole D/s thing together.



“Hnnnng, ju-just do it.” Blaine breathes out, moaning under Kurt’s gentle hands, “Harder. Please.” Frowning but compliant, Kurt starts to move faster, spurred by Blaine’s begging, until he’s pounding into him. He’s never been this rough with Blaine, but then again, Blaine has never let himself go like this, shameless and wanton, spread and flushed and taking Kurt’s cock and begging for more.

“Is this-“ Kurt pants, “is this okay?”

“Yes, yes, harder!” Hoarse and undone, Blaine is writhing, Kurt slamming into him, half worried that he’s hurting Blaine, but also deeply turned on. There’s something, something thrilling and dark curling at the base of his spine. Blaine looks so good, feels incredible, like he was meant for this, to take his cock and be taken, to be made his.

~*~

Later, curled up together, Kurt passes a hand through Blaine’s sweaty curls, wondering. They’re not new to sex, exactly. But they’ve only been doing this for a few months; there’s a lot left for them both to learn. Having sex is one thing; talking about it another. Blaine has always been the more comfortable of the two with discussion, which is why it flusters Kurt when Blaine balks at his questions.

“Blaine,” He starts quietly, tentative, feeling the flush staining his cheeks. He’s grateful they are together in the dark where Blaine can’t see the ever present colouring. “What was that about?”

“Hmm? What do you mean?” Blaine sounds sleepy and sated, his body bonelessly melting into Kurt’s from his position as the little spoon.

“You seemed….you wanted me to be rough?” Kurt hates the questioning tone in his voice, but can’t help but feel unsure. Blaine seems to tense slightly, then squirm a little.

“I- I’m really tired, Kurt.” Running gentle fingers down Blaine’s arm to tangle their hands together, Kurt exhales into the hollow of Blaine’s neck. He doesn’t want to push, so for now, he bites back his questions.

~*~

But they come back, the next time he has Blaine on his back, whimpering into his opened mouth. Blaine moves slowly, rocking with him carefully, hands shaking as he takes Kurt’s, bringing them over his head against the pillow. Pressing down, Kurt follows where Blaine leads, grinding into him just slightly harder. Bearing more weight on his hands, he holds Blaine down, fucking into him harder, then rougher, panting and nipping at Blaine’s lips and chin and neck.

“You like that? Want me to hold you down and make you take it?” His voice is lower than he’s ever heard it, and he’s very nearly ashamed of the hot spurt of lust that spears through him when Blaine blushes, turning away and closing his eyes but nodding, whispering, yesyesyes against the smooth skin of his bicep.

When it’s over and they lay in the wreckage, trembling and holding one another, Kurt tries again. But Blaine just turns, folding into himself and Kurt’s warmth in silence, leaving Kurt baffled and curious.

~*~

He watches and learns. It doesn’t happen all the time; it’s not every time they have sex that he sees that side, that wanting, in Blaine. Outside the bedroom, he never sees it at all. Never has an inkling that Blaine wants him to step in and take charge. If anything, he’s noticed how very much Blaine values his control; the ability to decide what he wants and how he wants it. Blaine dresses the way he wants to, sings songs that move him. He rarely drops his carefully constructed façade of control and good-natured cheer.

Only Kurt, who knows him best, knows that it’s a mask. Understands that like most teenagers, Blaine is riddled with insecurities and worries. Knows that mask is something Blaine needs to navigate his life; his family and their school. A world cruel enough to beat and torment a young boy for daring to believe it would be okay to go to a school dance with another boy. For wanting to believe that the world was capable of change, of kindness.

Which is why he is so thrown whenever it does happen. So often they are together and it’s exploration and discovery, tender fingers and trembling lips, breathing hard and soft into the give of flesh and bone.

And then there are times, like tonight, when it seems that Blaine is searching. Wanting something more, beyond his own grasp, looking for it in Kurt. Times the wanting simmers and bubbles between them and under Blaine’s skin until he can’t help but ask, can’t help but beg for something Kurt is never expecting to hear.

“Spank me, Kurt, please.” Blaine is wrecked, sweating and shaking. He’s on all fours, ass deliciously high in the air, spread out in a way that brings Kurt right to the edge, just from looking. When he hears Blaine’s groaned request, the rhythm of his hips stutters, his fingers clenching Blaine’s hipbones reflexively.

“Blaine?” Unsure, he starts to pull back, surprised when Blaine cries out and grinds back against him desperately,

“Please, please Kurt, I need you to.”

His hand is complying before his brain has had a chance to catch up, and the sound of his palm smacking against the tender curve of Blaine’s ass startles them both. His whimper is lost as Blaine groans, long and low, coming hard without touching himself. Surprised, Kurt comes too, feeling Blaine clenching and pulsing around him.

He doesn’t bother to ask what that was about later, knowing that he won’t be getting answers any time soon. The high colour on Blaine’s cheeks and downturned lashes veiling eyes that won’t meet his, afterwards, speak volumes.

Kurt falls asleep wondering what comes next.

~*~

Later, when he’s home alone, freshly scrubbed and bone tired, Kurt finds the time to really think. Blaine has always been open when it comes to sex. Talking about it, having it, initiating new things for them to try. So what is so different about this? They talk about everything, always. It worries Kurt that Blaine has this, kept secret and close to his skin, even in the moments when he can’t help but ask for more. Obviously, Kurt can tell, this is something Blaine wants. Needs even.

But what is it? Roughness? He remembers moments when they’ve been together; Blaine begging him to fuck him harder, to be used. How boneless and relaxed and sated he always seems after those encounters. And today, asking to be spanked; something Kurt’s never considered, a thought he’s never entertained before.

Entertained or not, it had been much hotter than he’d ever imagine it could have been. Blaine’s uncontrolled and visceral reaction. The feeling of owning, caring. Of having something precious and treasured in his hands to care for and watch over. Because asking for that, giving it had been about trust, of that he is absolutely sure. That if Blaine didn’t really, deeply trust him, he never would have asked Kurt to spank him the way he had, in the heat of the moment, at the height of his need.

Curious and unsure, Kurt rolls over to grab his laptop. Researching things like this on the internet has led him to some very scary places in the past. But without Blaine to talk to, the person he would normally go to with a problem like this, he knows his only real resource is the internet. If he’s careful and sticks to textual resources, he hopes to avoid the worst of the porn and scary images.

He starts with Wikipedia and works his way through various blog and chat sites, reading advice and gathering information. A plan is starting to form in his mind; nervously he jots notes and ideas. His favourite piece of advice comes from a blog site; the gist of which is that it is important to remember dominance and submission are not about the dominant party, but about the submissive. About the dom being in charge of the care and needs of the sub, emotionally and physically. Kurt notes advice for aftercare and for listening and watching for what Blaine might need, feeling nerves and arousal shimmer in his stomach and under his fingertips. He surprised by the feeling of arousal- he’s never thought of himself as that kind of a person and wondered if he can convincingly do this.

They have plans, tomorrow night. Blaine’s parents are out of town; like most horny teenage boys they know well enough to take advantage of each moment they can get alone with each other. Their plans have been for dinner, cooked together, and a movie, which neither of them think they’ll really watch.

As he settles in to sleep, feeling himself half hard and wanting, thinking of what he’s going to do tomorrow, Kurt smiles. He’s nervous but strangely, at home with the idea. Warm and somehow still turned on, even after his time spent with Blaine. Kurt pushes a hand slowly under the waistband of his pants, feeling himself thicken and harden as he strokes slow and sure. When he comes, it’s with Blaine’s name on his lips, hips stuttering in the air, with the memory of his hand, hard and stinging, against the planes of Blaine’s sweet ass.

~*~

Kurt spends the drive to Blaine’s house mentally preparing himself. Nerves roiling in his stomach, he tells himself that this is for Blaine as much, if not more, than for him. Even so, he can’t deny that the thought of what is going to happen is enough to get him half hard already. It’s not just being dominant; it’s being responsible for Blaine, being able to do this for him, give him something so primal that he needs. It’s knowing that Blaine needs this, even if he’s never been able to ask for it or vocalize the desire other than in the bedroom.

But this is something that Blaine needs; that much is obvious to Kurt. And committing to doing this, well- he has to really commit. He has to be able to walk into Blaine’s house sure in his roll and ready for what is going to come. It will be his job to guide and protect Blaine, to make choices and to know what’s best for them both, and he can’t do that if he’s unsure or nervous.

Taking a moment on the stoop to gather himself, Kurt breathes deep, inhaling scents of mild winter, snowless but barren gardens left drooping listlessly around him, and rings the bell.

~*~

“Hi.” Blaine’s smile breaks through the worry and doubt curled in the palms of his hands; Kurt’s fingers ache to touch. Kurt shuts the door behind him, not speaking, taking in Blaine’s comfortable clothes and gelled hair. When he drags Blaine toward him with rougher fingers than usual, he smirks to see the look of surprised confusion on his boyfriends face. Nipping just a little, he kisses Blaine, wet and dirty.

“I don’t want to wait for dinner, okay?”

Kurt can tell at first that Blaine is a little thrown, but not at all suspicious. But then Blaine is kissing back, pulling away with a tilted smile and a puzzled brow, questions clear on his face. Before he has a chance to speak, Kurt covers his still damp lips with a steady finger.

“Don’t speak, not until I tell you to.” Blaine’s eyebrows shoot up at the command, but he obeys,

“Now, I want you to go upstairs, get undressed, and wait for me. Do you understand?”

Blaine holds his gaze for three long beats, and for a minute Kurt is scared that maybe he’s read the whole situation wrong. But then Blaine nods, turning without a word, jogging up the stairs quickly.

Kurt stays by the door, counting slowly to 100, waiting for his cue. He straightens his hair with shaking fingers and breathes out, flat exhales expelling the last vestiges of nerves and doubt, before he starts to slowly climb the stairs.

~*~

Kurt enters Blaine’s room to find the lights dimmed and Blaine naked, sitting on the side of the bed. He’s already hard, cock in hand, stroking himself slow and sure, watching for Kurt’s arrival.

“Don’t touch yourself until I tell you to.” Kurt’s command is spoken softly, with caring, and he’s pleased to see that Blaine complies immediately, waiting for Kurt to tell him what to do next. Kurt comes to stand near the bed, never taking his eyes off of Blaine’s. They are honeyed dark, wide open and expectant.

“Kneel.”

Kurt takes a breath, subtly he hopes, as Blaine drops to his knees, inches from his painfully hard erection. There’s something, some glimmer in Blaine’s eye that tells Kurt he’s doing this well, that he’s on the right track. It’s love and acquiescence and need, desperate need. His fingers on Blaine’s head are gentle, the love he feels for this boy overwhelming and intense.

“Good boy.”

And it’s there, in that moment that Kurt knows he’s been right all along. That he’ll never regret making this decision. Because the look Blaine gives him in response to that simple praise is full of stunned gratitude. He nuzzles against Kurt’s hand on his cheek, eyes watery and huge.

“Blaine, this is important. Your safeword is red. If you want me to stop for any reason, I need you to use your safe word. If you need to pause but aren’t ready to stop, say yellow. Green is your go word. Do you understand?” He waits for Blaine’s nod, painfully aroused to see Blaine’s throat working convulsively as he speaks.

“Yes, Kurt.”

He waits a beat, nodding, before speaking again.

“Good. Now I want you to take my cock out.” Holding himself still, he watches as Blaine fumbles with shaking fingers, undoing his zipper and pulling his tight jeans down just enough. The elastic of his boxer briefs gets tucked under his balls. Blaine breathes hard, staring but not moving. Kurt feels a surge of pride, because his boy listens so well, waits so patiently.

“Your mouth is watering for it, isn’t it?” He asks softly, whispering as he traces a calm finger over the head of his own erection, taking in the way Blaine’s eyes are trained on the movement.

“Such a pretty slut, you want my cock in your mouth, don’t you?” Blaine’s nod is fast and immediate, and Kurt chuckles a little at the enthusiasm.

“Well, if you want it, pretty, you’ll have to beg.”
“P-please, Kurt, please let me.” Blaine’s voice is soft, but Kurt can hear the tremor of arousal in it.

“Oh, you’ll have to do better than that. Come on,” Kurt is fisting his cock now, smile dark and pleased when he sees Blaine licking his lips, barely biting back a groan, “Tell me how much you need it, what a cockslut you are for me.”

“God Kurt, I want it so bad, please, please let me suck your cock. I need to feel you in my mouth, it’s watering cause I need to taste you. Please.”

Kurt stops touching himself, nudging at Blaine’s lips with the tip of his leaking erection,

“Are you a slut for my cock?”

Blaine whispers against the hot flesh at his lips, tongue darting out to taste, just a bit,

“I’m your slut, I promise.”

The breath Kurt takes is deep, like a diver about to submerge in deep waters, then he’s sliding in, taking Blaine by his curls, forcing his mouth open wide and deep.

“Good boy.”

Kurt can feel it, the struggle as Blaine fights against his gag reflex. They are still relatively new to blow jobs, neither of them able to go as deep as maybe they’d like.

“You’re doing great,” Soothing, Kurt runs gentle fingers along Blaine’s hairline, “Deep breath,” He pulls out a little, watching Blaine breathe and carefully sliding back in, deeper, feeling as Blaine pauses, then swallows. Biting back a groan, Kurt looks away, holding onto Blaine’s curls and forcing himself not to come. He keeps fucking into Blaine’s mouth until eventually, unable to take much more, he pulls out. Rubbing his slippery cock over Blaine’s swollen lips, Kurt whimpers a little when Blaine licks, greedy and hungry, at the head.

Everything is wet, slip sliding and slick as he rubs harder, spreading spit and precome over Blaine’s face. Blaine’s eyes are closed, then open, and Kurt can’t help but slide back in, deeper and faster, almost relishing the feeling of Blaine gagging around him.

“Uh, unnnn yeah, yeah Blaine, you’re doing- uh- great.” He’s thrusting in, short and shallow thrusts interspersed with longer, deeper ones, testing Blaine’s limits. Blaine’s eyes are watering but steady on his, until suddenly they aren’t and he gags hard, pulling back and wheezing,

“Yellow, yellow.”

Kurt moves fast, kneeling with Blaine and pulling him into his arms. He’s making soothing noises as Blaine gasps, then shudders. Kurt’s hands knead at Blaine’s shoulders, then smooth down the long lines of his beautiful back.

“It’s okay, I’m here, what do you need?” He knows now, the tenderness that comes with holding someone else’s safety in your hands, the rush of love and power and knowing; knowing that he is the one who gets to take Blaine there. But even better is this, this moment when Blaine is cracking but trusting Kurt to catch him.

“I just needed a second.” Blaine mumbles, voice breaking quiet into the skin of Kurt’s neck.

“Are you all right, do you need to stop?” Blaine is shaking his head, and Kurt can feel the fine tremors, just under the hollows of his beautiful olive skin. His cock is achingly hard, even Kurt can tell, gorgeously red and swollen. Blaine’s eyes are dark and steady when he looks up, wiping his face a little,

“Green.”

Kurt is back on his feet in an instant, pulling Blaine’s head back roughly and looking him in the eye.

“You’re doing such a good job, such a good boy. Tap my thighs if it’s too much, okay?” He waits for Blaine’s nod before slipping his cock back in, grunting and pulling, fucking in harder and faster than before. He watches Blaine, keeping one part of his mind painfully on his boyfriend at all times, always aware for some signal of distress or discomfort. But Blaine persists, eyes closed and fingers digging into Kurt’s flexing hips.

His orgasm building, Kurt slows, then eases himself all the way until he feels himself in Blaine’s throat, all the while murmuring encouragement and endearments. He’s breathing harder, fast like he’s been running when he comes, fighting every instinct to fuck hard into Blaine’s throat. Instead he comes gentle, with a whimper and twisted fingers, eyes open and on Blaine the whole time.

“So good,” He breathes, eyes steady on Blaine’s, “So good beautiful boy, you did great. Would you like to come now?”

“Yes, please, Kurt.” It’s incredible, the rush Kurt gets from this; Blaine on his knees, eyes wide and on his. Considering, Kurt tilts his head.

“I’m not sure that you’ve earned it.” He watches Blaine’s pupils visibly dilate, his own cock making a valiant attempt to twitch. Thank god for fast recovery, he thinks wryly.

“Get on the bed, hands and knees.” Kurt struggles to keep a stern face, watching as Blaine scrambles off the floor, wincing, red kneed. He watches, feeling proprietary as Blaine gets on all fours. He walks around the bed, examining Blaine’s body.

“Turn in a circle.” He commands, watching the muscles of Blaine's wonderfully toned body shift, seeing colour flood Blaine’s face. Possessive and sure, he runs one warm hand from Blaine’s nape all the way to the crack of his ass. Climbing onto the bed behind him, he spreads Blaine’s cheeks, nipping hard at one of them, licking slow and sure at his hole, ignoring the whimpered
”Pleasepleaseplease.”

He spanks Blaine, the sound of his hand on Blaine’s flesh loud and startling in the quiet stillness of the room. They both jump, and Kurt speaks,

“I’m not sure you’ve earned it yet. You’ve been a good boy so far, but I don’t know that you’ve been good enough.” The next spank is more expected, his hand more sure. Red handprints bloom over the olive toned bend of Blaine’s ass. Kurt runs both hands over it, then Blaine’s back. He’s turned on and so, so desperately in love. He spanks again, soothing the reddening flesh with kisses and nips, his cock starting to harden again as Blaine groans, rocking his hips into the air.

Lubing up his fingers, he slips one in, tempering Blaine’s moans with another two spanks, one to each cheek.

“Such a slut, look how well you take it. I bet you can’t wait to have my cock inside you. Fucking filthy for it aren’t you?”

“Yes, unnnng, y-yes. Please, please, more.” Blaine’s begging brings Kurt all the way hard, aching to be inside and fucking rough into the warmth and give of Blaine’s flesh. He slips another finger in, running his other hand over Blaine’s swollen and discoloured ass cheeks, rubbing his thumb against the stretched rim of Blaine’s hole.

“God you’re such a slut for this, you can’t get enough can you, cockslut?”

“I am, god, Kurt,” Blaine whimpers, twisting. Kurt can tell he’s desperately searching, wanting friction against his cock. He twists his fingers, searching for Blaine’s prostate. He can’t always find it, but it can’t hurt to try. “I’m desperate, please Kurt, please fuck me, give me your cock.”

But Kurt just hums, spanking Blaine one last time, awkwardly with his lame hand, before bending to kiss then lick at where he now is three fingers deep in Blaine’s ass.

“Kurt, Kurt, I- I’m gonna-“ Abruptly Kurt pulls back,

“No you aren’t. You aren’t coming until I give you permission, slut.” Blaine’s whole body shudders, his whimpers pathetic and needy. Both hands are on Blaine’s ass cheeks now, spreading them apart. He just looks.

“Are you ready, Blaine, for my cock now?” His whisper is filthy, falling between the knobs of Blaine’s sweet spine as Kurt bends over him. Kurt’s cock hard against Blaine’s ass, he nips, leaving bite marks along Blaine’s shoulders.

“Yes, yesyes, please.”

“Hmmmm” Kurt preens, even though Blaine can’t see him, “I don’t think you’ve done well enough to deserve my cock.”

“No, no please, please, I need it. Kurt I- I can’t wait, please”

Kurt aches, watching Blaine’s whole body tremble as Blaine whimpers. Still wrapped around Blaine, chest to back with his knees between Blaine’s, Kurt nudges Blaine’s legs further apart. He leans up, enjoying the way Blaine is spread before him. Once again he takes his hands and uses them to spread Blaine’s ass, fascinated by the way his open hole is clenching and desperate. For a moment he just watches, tracing gentle touches around and over while Blaine begs, face in the sheets and broken-voiced, for his dick.

Taking some sort of pity, Kurt reaches around, grasping Blaine’s cock; he barely has to touch before Blaine is shouting and throbbing, his whole body arching into the orgasm. Kurt strokes him through it, quiet and wondering, waiting until Blaine has slumped down, aftershocks still quivering through his muscles.

“I didn’t say you could come Blaine.”

Still gasping, Blaine turns his face to the side. He’s puddle into the sheets, curling into himself like a kitten; it’s temptation and wanting that curves over Kurt’s muscles and skin. He can see that Blaine is sweating, eyes closed, beautiful lashes fanned against apple red cheeks.

“No, sir.”

As he speaks the words, something snaps in the air, crackling between them, and Blaine’s eyes pop open. Kurt has to bite his lip and squeeze the base of his cock, hard, to keep from coming. Blaine settles back into position on his hands and knees, shaking with the effort.

Blaine speaks, voice cracking and weak, “I’m sorry Sir, I’ll do better next time, I promise.”

“You’ll do better.” Kurt’s tone is flat. He reminds himself that Blaine needs this from him, even as his heart stutters and his hands ache to soothe. “You’ll be a good boy? You’ll listen when you’re told not to come?”

“Yes, Sir, yes. Please, I’ll do anything.” There’s tears, Kurt can hear them breaking through Blaine’s cries, and his chest constricts at the sound of them. It’s in his power to make this better. He can stop, hold Blaine, comfort him. A large part of him wants badly to do just that. But Blaine hasn’t said red, hasn’t safeworded, and Kurt is starting to understand; not a lot, but enough to know that Blaine needs this. Needs to be broken down so he can be built back up again. And Kurt is the one he’s trusting to do that. He takes a deep breath, so thankful that Blaine can’t see him now. He’s been entrusted with an awesome responsibility; it makes his fingers tremble and his heart stutter to think of it. He knows what he has to do. So long as Blaine is still ready to play, he’ll be here, ready to give him what he needs. This is love, he understands now. He doesn’t understand why Blaine needs this, but right now, the need speaks loudly enough; Kurt could never say no to something so visceral, something in his power to give.

Something only he can give Blaine.

“Do you think you can do better this time, slut?”

“Yes, Kurt, I can.” Kurt takes a hitching breath, trying to control his nerves, because god, Blaine just sounds so broken.

“Turn over.” He can’t help but give the command softly, feeling tenderness and worry washing through him. When Blaine hurries to comply, Kurt can clearly see the tears streaking down Blaine’s face and his heart twists painfully. Unable to pretend that he can’t see them, he lays on Blaine, ignoring the way his body reacts to the stimulus. One shaking hand starts to wipe at the tears, his own eyes wanting to tear up in sympathy.

“Blaine, are you okay?” Blaine just nods and closes his eyes, fresh tears starting and rolling slow and deep down his face. It’s not enough for Kurt though. He’s never seen Blaine like this before, open and soft, but fractured and wanting at the same time.

“Blaine, I need you to answer me, I’m worried. Red, Yellow or Green?” Blaine turns his face into Kurt’s hand, whispering,

“Green, green,” He arches his back, sinew and bone, slowly against Kurt’s tingling body, voice breathless and wanton, cracked and desperate, “Green, green, please Kurt just take me and make me yours, greengreengreen.”

Kurt has to close his eyes, biting back his own groan, reaching with shaking fingers for a condom. He takes a deep breath.

“Spread your legs, let me look at what I’m about to fuck.” He orders, and Blaine obeys instantly, using his own hands to spread his cheeks for Kurt’s eyes. It’s close to the hottest thing Kurt has ever seen. Blaine is beautiful like this, split open and spilling need into the darkened room. Wanting to be sure he sees it all, doesn’t miss a moment of this, Kurt stretches to turn on the bedside light. His hands on Blaine’s body are more sure now, ready and possessing. He runs them over arms and legs, into Blaine’s hair which is sweaty and freed from the gel. He touches the hollows of Blaine’s neck, the notches of his hips, appreciating and worshiping, whispering praise and love,

“Such a good boy, so beautiful, so mine. Are you mine?”

“Ye-yes, Kurt, I’m yours, please, please make me yours.” Blaine begs, tears standing out in his beautiful hazel eyes.

“Will you be a good boy, and do what I say? Do you think you can listen this time and wait?” Kurt’s voice is hard but quiet, he’s scratching at Blaine’s nipples carefully, biting and leaving a mark on Blaine’s collarbone. He moves back to admire his work as Blaine thrashes against him, cock already hard and needy again.

“Yes, Kurt, please. I’ll be a good boy, for you I’ll do anything.” Their eyes meet and Kurt wants to say it back, I’ll do anything for you. It goes unsaid but paints itself in the air between them, washing and colouring the spaces between their bodies with love and understanding and trust.

Eyes on each other, Kurt moves, spreading Blaine’s legs further apart, using his cock to spread lube around Blaine’s hole. Blaine groans, low and long, and Kurt knows that the moment for tenderness is over.

Kurt slams in, biting back his own groan as Blaine arches and cries out. He doesn’t take a minute, not letting Blaine get used to the feeling or the intrusion. He’s trusting Blaine as much as Blaine is trusting him, knowing that if it’s too much Blaine will say so.

“Yes, please, like that, I want to feel it tomorrow and the day after, feel you inside me.” Blaine’s face is a study of pleasure and pain, his fingers scrabbling into the sheets, knotting and twisting and wanting. Kurt sets a fast pace, slamming in, already out of breath,

“Make you mine, mark you up so the whole world knows, right?” It’s a little shocking, how easily the words come out of his mouth, the way he’s growling them as he bites at Blaine’s ear and neck, leaving behind a trail of prints. He’s marking, making Blaine his, thrilling in Blaine’s cries,

“Yes, yes, yours…always.” Blaine’s face is turned away, their hands now locked together as Kurt pounds into him, feeling need and heat coil in his stomach. He ghosts a kiss over a particularly purple mark. He’s not sorry for it at all. Blaine’s hands unwind from his, coming around to grab and pull Kurt closer. He’s thrusting up, meeting Kurt half way, groaning and crying, tears still in his eyes.

“I love you, you’re such a beautiful boy, so good around my cock, oh- oh god you make me throb.” Kurt is kissing and licking and biting into Blaine’s mouth, swallowing Blaine’s panted exhales,
“You feel so good, like you were made for this, for my cock.”

“I was, I was, g-god Kurt, harder, please. Hurt me.”

And so Kurt does, leaning up to take Blaine’s legs, bending them back against Blaine’s chest and fucking into him as hard and as fast as he can. His breath burns in his lungs, sweat dripping into his eyes. His hips feel like they’ll carry bruises in the morning, from the force of his thrusting. He watches, wide eyed, as his erection slams into Blaine, over and over. Raking his nails down Blaine’s thighs, hard, Kurt moans at the sight of fine pink ribbons that bloom under Blaine’s skin.

“Love this, love the way you look, so filthy and spread out and taking it like such a good boy.” Kurt pauses to pull out, ignoring Blaine’s desperate whimpers, spanking him hard, three times in quick succession. “Love the way you let me mark you up so that everyone knows you’re mine, my good, good boy.” And he’s breaking down, a little bit. It’s hard, he’s so primal and raw right now, everything between them so honest and exposed, to keep up the façade. Right now, all Kurt really wants is to cherish and love Blaine, beautiful Blaine who still has tears on his face and is biting his lip to keep from coming as he abuses and pounds into him.

Later, he’ll understand that this moment is about love, about care and cherishing Blaine in the ways he most needs. But for now, he’s torn, and slowing a bit, moves closer to take Blaine’s cock in hand.

Kurt moves slower, taking the moment in- Blaine’s tear-streaked face and eyes, the way it feels to be so deep, so close, together. He can feel it, curling into his toes and calves, his orgasm building from somewhere secret and dark and so, so deep within him.

“Do you want to come now, Blaine?” Deceptively soft, threads of steel underpinning Kurt’s voice as he jerks Blaine, slow and sure, all the while fucking him in the same manner.

“Yes, Kurt, please.” Blaine’s eyes train on him, open and beguiling and Kurt is undone, leaning in to lay his lips tendersoft on Blaine’s,

“Come, then. You’ve been such a good boy for me. Come now.” And Blaine does, arching and exposing the fluid line of his neck, ropes of come spurting hot between their trembling and wrecked bodies. He’s silent, barely moving, hardly breathing as he comes. Between his fingers, Kurt can feel the throbbing and pulsing of Blaine’s orgasm, and when Blaine’ clenches around him, he comes as well, stuttering into him and biting his lip, hard.

They come down together, Kurt plastered over Blaine’s body, both of them shaking. Kurt murmurs endearments and whispered love into Blaine’s skin where his face is pressed against Blaine’s shoulder. Eventually, Kurt finds the energy to move. Blaine is limp under him, his legs slumping gracelessly to the bed when Kurt gets up.

Padding carefully to the bathroom, Kurt collects a washcloth, soaking it in warm water and wiping himself clean. Getting a fresh one out, he wets it and goes over to sit by Blaine. Blaine doesn’t move as Kurt carefully wipes the come off of his stomach. Kurt moves to wipe slow and gentle between Blaine’s ass cheeks, wincing at how swollen and red his hole is. Blaine doesn’t move or twitch; the only sign of life are his eyes, which follow all of his movements around the room. Kurt recalls the information he’d read online, about the importance of aftercare and support for the sub. He crawls carefully onto the bed, smiling when Blaine curls up and into him, still shivering.

“Blaine, honey, what do you need right now?” He’s a little alarmed by how cold Blaine is. He wraps a leg over Blaine’s, scooting in as close as he can, hoping to share body heat.

“Dunno, cold.” Blaine slurs, cuddling closer and burrowing in. Kurt chafes his hands up and down Blaine’s back, thinking.

“Hold on just a second okay? I’m going to go warm up the shower for you.” He tucks Blaine in with the duvet, unable to resist passing a tender hand through Blaine’s hair. Blaine looks up at him with sleepy and trusting eyes.

Kurt wanders around the unfamiliar bathroom, searching for something with a soothing scent, finding a scented body wash in the cupboard under the sink. When he turns from adjusting the water and spray, he finds a sleepy Blaine behind him in the doorway.

“What are you doing? I was going to come and get you.” His smile is hesitant, but Blaine’s isn’t.
“I missed you.” Is all he says, stepping closer and closing the door before pulling Kurt into his arms.

A warm mist is filling the room as they stand, holding one another. Testing the water and deeming it warm enough, Kurt shuffles Blaine into the shower. He stands Blaine under the water, running his fingers gently through curls, working the last vestiges of gel from Blaine’s hair. They don’t speak.

Kurt has questions, lots of them. He wonders; if Blaine will want to talk about this, this time. What happened, and if it was the right thing to do. If he made the right choices, and what will happen in the future.

But this moment is about Blaine, who seems content to stand with his eyes closed and let Kurt care for him. Until he chooses to speak, Kurt won’t. Gentle and sure-fingered, Kurt lathers Blaine’s hair, the scent of Blaine’s shampoo steaming into the air, curling around him like comfort and home. It’s a smell Kurt is familiar with; he loves best the nights when he’s been with Blaine at his house and can smell him all over his own sheets.

Tilting Blaine’s head back, he rinses the shampoo out, catching and steadying him when he sways on his feet. Blaine sags into him, murmuring apologies into the wet curve of his neck, which Kurt just brushes off. He eases Blaine against the wall of the shower, where Blaine braces his forearms in front of his face.

“I’m going to give you a massage now, if that’s okay?” Kurt waits for Blaine’s nod before starting, smoothing the scented body wash over the long muscles of Blaine’s back. Digging his thumbs in between Blaine’s shoulder blades, he kisses slow and sweet along Blaine’s neck.

“I love you so much, you are so beautiful. Do you know how special you are, how much you mean to me?” Blaine makes some noise of assent, and Kurt moves his hands up to knead at tense shoulders and Blaine’s neck. He moves, coming around Blaine, still kneading, until he’s in front of him. Blaine’s back is leaning against the shower wall. He feels warm and loose against Kurt.
“But best of all is this…” Kurt stops his ministrations long enough to trace fingers over the spot where Blaine’s heart beats, hard and strong. “Your heart; the way you love me, who you are. I could never have dreamed of anything so incredible as you in my life. I am so lucky, every day.” Kurt kisses Blaine, their tongues touching softly, “That I get to love you, that you’ve given me the gift of your love.” He kisses him harder, hands in Blaine’s hair, water sluicing over them in the damp closet of the shower. It’s not desire, it’s not frantic and wanting, it’s love, deep and abiding.

Their fingers curl together as Blaine sags, heavy and exhausted, against him. Turning off the water, Kurt guides Blaine out and sits him against the counter top. With care and sure hands, he dries Blaine completely, even lifting his feet, one at a time, to dry the soles. When he leads Blaine back into the bedroom, it’s with fingers tangled together again.

He tucks Blaine back into bed tenderly, fussing over the covers, unable to resist pressing a kiss to Blaine’s cheek.

“You should eat something, have some water. I’m going to go get you a snack, ok?” Kurt watches as Blaine burrows more comfortably into the bed.

“Mmmhmmm, hungry.”

Kurt smiles, and with another parting kiss, turns to run downstairs. He throws together a plate with cut up cheese and sliced apples and crackers, grabbing two bottles of water from the fridge as well. It feels a little funny to be making himself at home in the Anderson’s kitchen with no one else around. He has no urge to linger, despite the modernized appliances and appealing granite countertop. Moving fast, afraid that Blaine will fall asleep before he gets back up, Kurt takes the stairs back up two at a time.

He finds Blaine sleepy-eyed and comfortable in his bed, waiting for him. The smile reaches Blaine’s eyes before his mouth; a trait Kurt has always loved about Blaine. He’s so expressive, so warm. It must take a lot out of him to always be so unfailingly kind, to keep his temper in check time and again when people (not that he’s naming names, Finn) take jabs at him, over and over.

Blaine holds the covers of the bed up, inviting Kurt in. Gladly Kurt snuggles next to Blaine, whose body has already created a tiny pocket of warmth under the duvet. Slowly, he feeds Blaine bits of cheese and apple. They don’t talk except for murmured thank you’s and pleases When Blaine nibbles a piece of cheese from his fingers, Kurt’s heart contracts with the knowledge of love.

Soon enough, after coaxing crackers and water into him as well, Blaine’s eyes are drooping. Kurt settles him in his arms, massaging gently at Blaine’s scalp and humming under his breath. Together like this, its warm and comforting and Kurt thinks he’d be happy to have this for the rest of his life. Once Blaine is asleep he checks the time- he has to leave in thirty minutes, which seems too soon and too far away. He doesn’t want to leave Blaine, who looks peaceful; whose memory remains in Kurt’s head, crying and breaking open under his hands.

But at the same time, he needs some time too, to process and understand. To come to terms with what’s happened between them tonight. To understand his own visceral and kinetic reactions to Blaine’s tears and pleas and responses.

Blaine asleep is a picture of rest in a way that cannot be captured when he’s awake. Awake, Blaine is movement and energy, smiles and unflagging cheer. In sleep, the lines of his face soften and he’s younger, more vulnerable, and exponentially more beautiful. Kurt threads his fingers through Blaine’s thick curls, enjoying their weight and texture. Blaine’s breath hitches, then smooths as he sleeps. When Kurt leans in to press a light kiss to Blaine’s lips, he stirs, whispering a responding good bye to Kurt’s.

~*~

Kurt aches, literally, all night without Blaine. Leaving him, defenseless and vulnerable, had been the hardest thing he’s done in a long time. His father was home, however, and it was a school night- there’d been no choice, really.

It’s past 2 am and Kurt is wide awake, thinking over the night’s activities. So much of his attention had been focused on Blaine, on doing and saying the right things. On watching Blaine’s reactions and emotions. He hadn’t really been able to process how he’d felt about anything that had happened.

But he can now, and the truth is that he liked it. He really, really liked it. Reliving the evening; details painting their way through his mind’s eye, pictures vivid behind his eyelids- the way Blaine had looked, spread and flushing, ass red with handprints. The rawness, Blaine’s voice broken, needs exposed as he begged to be hurt, to be taken and owned. Kurt can feel his cock twitch at the memory and has to bite down on his pillow. Soon enough he’s fully hard, taking himself in hand gently. When he comes it’s with Blaine’s image in his head, spread open and begging for more.

~*~

Focusing at school the next day is impossible for either of them. Kurt knows this because Blaine had texted him during 4th period,

I can’t even pretend to be paying attention right now.

Kurt can feel a sweep of relief rush through him and for the first time since the night before; well since this all started really, he breathes easily. Because Blaine has just acknowledged what had happened. To Kurt this feels like a door being opened, even just the tiniest bit. They’ve always talked about everything, up until this started; communication has always been the cornerstone of their relationship. Not for the first time, Kurt actively wishes for the day to be over so that he can talk to Blaine.

~*~

It’s an unspoken agreement to meet at Blaine’s house after glee practice; his parents are still out of town. Kurt hopes, with the silence on the topic that has pervaded the rest of his day, that Blaine is still open to talking. Not that he’d mind an encore, but considering how raw and emotional things had gotten the night before, he’d really like confirmation that he’s doing what Blaine wants. Giving him something that he needs. And he can’t lie, a large part of him is struggling to understand why Blaine needs it, and what he is getting from it. Maybe, Kurt hopes, with understanding will come a better idea of how to give Blaine exactly what it is that he wants.

Kurt pulls up on Blaine’s driveway with nerves in his fingers and a heart stuttering with anxiety. He takes a moment, smoothing his hair and breathing deeply before exiting the car. When Blaine opens the door to him, he’s greeted with a soft kiss and an intimate smile. He takes a deep breath to speak, only to be interrupted by Blaine.

“I think we should talk.”

“Ok.” Kurt stands in the doorway, unsure what to do with his hands.

“Come in, let’s sit.” Blaine leads him to the living room, which is probably for the best. It’s formal and not the sort of place Kurt could ever imagine himself getting carried away in. Seeing Blaine, being alone with him after yesterday’s events- it takes quite a bit of effort on his part not to tackle Blaine to the floor and rut against him helplessly until they both come.
Blaine is rubbing his palms against his thighs nervously. “Do you want some water?” Polite to a fault, Blaine waits until Kurt is seated. Kurt shakes his head, hating the stilted awkwardness between them. Reaching out, he takes Blaine’s hands and pulls him down onto the couch, kissing him sweetly. He settles close to Blaine, propped elbow on the back of the couch. His feet are curled up under him, his knees pressing against Blaine’s warm legs.

“So,” Kurt starts, hoping he’s broken the ice somehow. His fingers play with Blaine’s. “Let’s talk. Do you want to go first?”

Blaine nibbles at his lip, then sighs, “I guess I should…I just don’t really know where to start.”

“Me either,” Kurt admits softly, “I’m just glad you’re talking to me about this now.”

Blaine shrugs, shifting a little, “I didn’t- I mean…I didn’t know what to say, before.”
“And now?” Kurt prompts.

“I don’t know if I know what to say, only that I know we need to talk about it.” The sit in silence for a few minutes, thinking. Blaine is threading his fingers with Kurt’s, tangling and untangling them.

“Blaine- what happened yesterday…is that something you want to do again?” Kurt starts, cautiously. Blaine looks away, biting on one of his nails until Kurt pulls his hand away from his mouth.

“Yes? I mean, I don’t know. Do you?”

Kurt sighs, “Blaine…I do if you do. Everything yesterday- I enjoyed it, but I did it for you as much, if not more, as for myself. I feel like…you needed something. You’ve needed something you either could not ask for or weren’t willing to ask for. So I did some research and decided…I guess, to take matters into my own hands.”

Blaine doesn’t look at him, fiddling with his fingers instead, “What did you research?”
Kurt can feel the blush staining his cheeks, but answers calmly, “I researched D/s play- Dominant and submissive play.” Blaine twitches, hands jerking hard in his.

“I- I’ve researched it too,” he admits, quiet voice small in the big room. “I just didn’t know how to ask you for- I mean, to talk to you about it.”

Kurt stares, taking in Blaine’s reddening cheeks and downcast eyes, wondering.

“Blaine, you know you can ask me for anything right? I need you to know that.”

Blaine nods, still not looking at him. Kurt’s sigh is heavy. Finally, he breaks the silence by pulling Blaine forward into a rough kiss, licking into Blaine’s mouth in the dirtiest way he can. He kisses over Blaine’s cheek before biting down on his collarbone, hard.

“Blaine, I liked it. I loved it. I went home last night and got off just thinking about it all over again. This is something I want to do if you do.” Stopping, he darts a look up, “But I need to understand, why. What you need, why you like it, what you like about it. So that I can do better, so that I can give you what you need, okay? So I need you to talk to me, please.”

Blaine leans forward, kissing him softly, running fingers up and down Kurt’s arms.

“Okay.” He leans back, “But can we go upstairs for that? I have an idea, something that might help me feel more comfortable talking.”

Kurt follows Blaine up the stairs, feeling cautiously optimistic but also nervous because he isn’t sure what Blaine is going to ask of him. Once they are in Blaine’s room, Blaine turns, pressing Kurt against his bedroom door and attacking Kurt’s mouth with his own. For long minutes they stay as they are, kissing desperately, hands wandering and grasping, until Kurt
breaks away.

“We need to talk,” he pants as Blaine kisses wet, with a hint of teeth, along his neck. “We should go back down stairs.”

“No, no.” Blaine is pressing against him, the long line of his already hard cock tantalizing against Kurt’s leg. Kurt’s been achingly hard since he kissed Blaine downstairs and admitted, out loud, how much he loved what they’d done the night before. “I need this. I need to feel close to you,” He pulls back to look into Kurt’s eyes. “I need you to make love to me. It always feels easier, asking- needing, when we’re together like that. This time I promise that afterwards I’ll talk.”

Kurt can feel his resolve weakening; Blaine’s fingers are busy at his buttons, undoing them quickly. With a moan he brings his own hands up, kneading at the strong line of muscles in his boyfriends back. Blaine has this way of turning him inside out with desire. His body, his soul, the tenor of his voice and the rich way that he loves Kurt: all things he needs and wants badly.
“You promise?” He begs, knees weak as Blaine runs fingers over his sensitive nipples.

“I promise.” Blaine is licking, one nipple and then another, his warm breath bringing goose bumps along Kurt’s skin. “There’s something about being with you, like this, that helps. Brings my walls down. I need that.” Blaine admits, pressing both hands inside the waistband of Kurt’s pants, cupping his ass and squeezing as they both moan, rocking together.

Soon enough they are naked, tangled together on cold sheets, warming each other until they are both pliant and desperate. When Kurt takes Blaine into his mouth it’s with eyes brimming with love and a heart staccato beating out of his chest with it. Turning, he lets Blaine take him in hand, shuddering at the feel of his warm fingers, caressing and unknotting the tension wracking his body. He comes just as Blaine does, the taste of Blaine hot on his tongue enough to send him over the edge, moaning and gasping and trembling.

For long minutes they lay, Kurt sheltered in Blaine’s arms as they come down, until Blaine starts to speak into the silent room.

“I didn’t realize what it was, at first. After…I felt embarrassed because it seemed strange to me. I didn’t understand how something like you being rough, or holding me down, could make me feel so- so good. Loved.”

Against Blaine’s chest, Kurt nods to show he is listening, indicating that Blaine should keep going.

“But then…the night I asked you to spank me- I guess I figured that I had to think about it, or figure out what was going on. So I spent the night thinking. And I realized that in a perfect scenario, I wouldn’t have to ask. Not for you to hold me down or be rough or spank me or anything really. Because I just wanted to be used, to be yours. I—I’m not explaining very well am I?”

“You’re doing great. You don’t have to have the perfect words, just tell me how you feel.” Kurt presses a kiss to Blaine’s chest where his heart is beating, fast and nervous.

“I realized that when you did those things, it felt like you were taking this burden off of me. I trust you so much, Kurt. When you’re rough, or hold me down, it feels like the only thing I have to think about is you. Being used by you makes me feel like I’m yours. That being yours is the only thing I have to think about, and the rest of the world and my worries and stress fall away. I didn’t really realize all of those things until the night that you spanked me. That night, after I thought about it all and saw that that’s what I was feeling, I looked up submission. It sounded like something I was interested in, but I didn’t know how to ask. Because it’s hard to explain. It might be easier now, after last night, but…”

“But?” Kurt prompts.

“I’m not even sure that I understand, so I don’t know how to make you understand. That it feels like love. Like I’m yours, like I’m so cared for. But also…last night…felt so freeing. I feel like I have so many worries, so many people to think about, the pressure of being me all the time- you took all of that away. And all I had to think about was pleasing you.”

“Hmm,” Kurt interrupts, “So the name calling? I’m sorry if that was wrong, it just came out.”

“No,” Blaine is threading his fingers through Kurt’s hair gently, sounding shy. “I liked that. I liked everything. I loved the moments when you called me your good boy; it felt so good, like I was doing something right.”

“But…the rest of it, the name calling and being rough and making you…” Kurt clears his throat, feeling the words stick. “Uncomfortable?”

“It was kind of like you were breaking me down and building me back up. I don’t know that I can explain this part, but trust me, I liked it. I felt so…stripped and raw and it was freeing. You were emptying me of everything else, everything but you and it was so good. When you were talking me through…blowing you-”

Kurt smiles at the blush in Blaine’s voice but doesn’t say anything.

“It felt right, it felt like I was so cherished and you were calling me ‘good boy’ and talking me through it and you were there for me. And I’m sorry I cried at the end, it just…everything was so close to the surface and it felt like you took everything off of me, all this weight and it was this huge catharsis, just letting everything that ties me up and worries me and makes me feel stressed out come out. And I needed that. I need that.” Blaine’s fingers still in his hair, and Kurt leans his chin on Blaine’s chest to look him in the eye.

“You need that?”

“Not all the time,” Blaine amends, “But sometimes- I mean you’ve seen it come out sometimes when we’re together. I mean- it turns me on, a lot, but more so, emotionally, this is something good for me, I think.”

“So, you want to do that again?” Kurt ventures. Blaine shifts a little. The sheets rustle as he moves his legs, searching for a more comfortable position.

“Yes.” It’s spoken in a small voice, one that is scared of asking, of the admission. But the honesty warms Kurt, expanding in his chest and unfurling into his fingers. Rolling onto Blaine, he stacks his hands on Blaine’s chest and looks down at him. Love rushes through him, washing him in the knowledge of trust and safety and wanting.

“I want to, too.” He admits. Blaine’s smile is small and a little uncertain. Kurt leans forward to lay a gentle kiss to his lips.

“We’ll have to research more, make sure we do things right. Set limits for what we are both comfortable with and what we don’t want to happen.” Blaine nods, fingers running along the smooth skin of Kurt’s back, leaving him tingling and aware of the hard and beautiful body underneath his.

“Is it ok…” Blaine worries his lip, frowning, “I don’t want it to be like that all the time. I feel like I’d miss things like tonight, you know? Just sometimes?”

Happy, Kurt nods, “Yes. I would miss this too.” The smile at each other, and Kurt meets Blaine half-way in a kiss full of promise and desire and ultimately, love.